Bracket of Guys, Round 1.1
And so it begins.
Hopefully you've filled out your own bracket and torn your heart asunder because this mess is emotional taxing, y'all. I'm not ashamed to admit that.
Okay, maybe a little bit ashamed. NEVERTHELESS WE PERSIST.
This bracket of our favorite guys has been organized based on percentage of votes received, so even though some of the matchups might feel abnormally hard, it's not arbitrary. Some guys simply didn't snag as many votes as other competitors.
You will now be asked to cast your vote in the first round of the East Hot Region. It's eight votes... eight chances for you to dig deep, be brave, and make the hard call.
Let's do this.
#1 Colin Firth vs. #16 Harrison Ford
I KNOW. I'm already prepared to burn my entire bracket.
Colin Firth is classy, tall, British, and destroyed the other Colins with the fury of a thousand Mr. Darcys. His dominating performance in Pride and Prejudice led to his dominating performance on this blog, making him the overall #1 seed with the highest winning percentage of the entire field.
AND HE'S GOING AGAINST HARRISON FORD. Harrison came in third to Benedict Cumberbatch and Milo Ventimiglia in the Favorite Guy with a Singular Name category, and that has put him in the lowest seed. Insanity.
Good luck, dear ones.
Favorite Thing About Colin: how he's not really hot but also super hot
Favorite Thing About Harrison: the smirk
(Yes, those are both physical attributes just let me have this objectification, please.)
#8 Andy Garcia vs. #9 Adam Levine
They've got a weird father-son thing, right? Do you see it? Look for them this fall in the film Tattoos Over Manhattan.
Favorite Thing About Andy: That part in Oceans when he looks in the mirror and says "I was born ready" and then George Clooney rolls his beautiful eyes. (Also, yes, I realize there's no George. The world is not perfect.)
Favorite Thing About Adam: That I listen to Maroon 5 way more than I'm comfortable admitting.
#4 David Tennant vs. #13 Ben Stiller
In middle school, did you ever list out your classmates in alphabetical order and pair them up to see who would get married when you were old and 24? Just me? Cool. Well, that's kind of how I feel with this pairings, minus the marriage. Because don't these guys look like brothers a little? The nose? The expression?
I might have already gotten carried away with this whole thing.
Favorite Thing About David: Broadchurch. Jessica Jones. Amen.
Favorite Thing About Ben: That he's been married to his wife for a million years.
#5 Ryan Gosling vs. #12 Matt Bomer
Now we're in trouble. Two beautiful Ken dolls throwing down... but actually probably not throwing anything because they're both way too polite and kind.
I'm still shocked that Ryan lost his week to Reynolds, but it's cool. It was pre-La La Land, so I don't fault you guys for getting it wrong.
Favorite Thing About Ryan: Everything. Absolutely everything. And maybe the fact that he took the time to shake the hand of every single one of those tourists during the Academy Awards even when the camera had already passed him by.
Favorite Thing About Matt: The intense hotness.
#6 Rob Lowe vs. #11 Bradley Whitford
Sam Seaborn vs. Josh Lyman. I couldn't have planned this any better.
(I've never seen The West Wing. I know. I'm appalled at myself. I WILL I PROMISE.)
From The Outsiders to The Grinder, Rob is fantastic (don't explore his personal life too much though), and Bradley Whitford was magical in Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip. This one is lit-rally super hard.
Favorite Thing About Rob: Chris Trager and Dean Sanderson.
Favorite Thing About Bradley: His voice sounds like the big brother I always wanted.
#3 Jimmy Fallon vs. #14 Zachary Quinto
I feel badly for Zachary because I don't think he stands a chance. Jimmy ran away with his category, and Zachary came in second to Zachary Levi. If this one is an upset, I'll only watch the second season of Heroes to the exclusion of all other shows.
Favorite Thing About Jimmy: Hands down when he realized he was set up with Nicole Kidman and didn't know it.
Favorite Thing About Zachary: His turn as Sylar. Amazing.
#7 Adam Scott vs. #10 Michael Fassbender
Somebody hold me.
These two couldn't be more different. One is dorky; the other is made of sexy fire. One is hilarious and self-depricating; the other is made of sexy fire. One is regular and could be friends with your friends; the other is made of sexy fire.
Y'all, I love Adam Scott. BUT MICHAEL FASSBENDER IS RIDICULOUS. I'm blinded by the sexy fire. Don't listen to me.
Favorite Thing About Adam: The Cones of Dunshire.
Favorite Thing About Fassy: The sexy fire.
#2 Will Smith vs. #15 Colin O'Donoghue
I'm predicting an upset.
Will Smith is fantastic. FANTASTIC. But his field of competition was a bit weak, so he won by a huge margin. And to go up against Captain Hook? Especially seasons one and two Captain Hook??? Tough matchup, Will. The hook is powerful.
Favorite Thing About Will: When he tries to be cool and isn't. Lots of sniffing.
Favorite Thing About Colin: His single raised eyebrow.
Voting is closed!
Winners of round one will be announced here on March 30th.