I'm Kendra, and I'm here to help you be a genius about the things that matter and lazy about the things that don't. Welcome to your people.

Stupid Easy Facial Toner

Stupid Easy Facial Toner


Did you already make the Stupid Cheap Homemade Eye Makeup Remover? And have you stopped washing your hair and moved to a commune? No? Then I've proven you can be a regular person who makes your own beauty products. More people do it than you realize, so it's time to join the party.

Next up? Facial toner. 

First, the math. 
8.5 oz bottle of Neutrogena toner - $6 ($9 for the pore-reducing stuff)
8.5 oz bottle of this stuff - $0.75 (maybe $1 if you get fancy)

Next, the ingredients.
You've already purchased a bottle of witch hazel from Target to make your eye makeup remover, but just a reminder, it's next to the alcohol and hydrogen peroxide and costs literal pennies. All you add to it? Brewed green tea. For real. Just do two parts witch hazel and one part green tea to achieve toner perfection.

Want to get fancy? I also add a teaspoon of vitamin E to my 3 oz spray bottle plus a few drops of grapefruit and neroli essential oils. You could also use any skin-friendly oil you have like lavender, frankincense, geranium, cedarwood, or tea tree. 

So how does toner actually work?
When you wash your face, the friction from your hands, washcloth, and even soap removes dead skin cells which naturally opens your pores. If you stop right there, your skin will be fine, but those freshly opened pores are like a little puppy, sweet and happy but too stupid to know how dangerous the world can be. So if you wash your face at night and then lie down on your pillow that's covered in hair oil, skin cells, and makeup residue from all the other nights you don't wash your face, those sweet pores are in for a rude awakening. We need to close those puppies and fast.

That's what toner does. It tightens your skin, creating a protective barrier. Most store-bought toners make your skin feel like it's made of latex or that you just got the wrong kind of plastic surgery. Too tight, too weird. But if your toner includes simple ingredients that are also antioxidants, your skin gets strengthened, your pores get smaller, and you don't feel like you're being cast on Real Housewives: Beauty Gone Wrong. 

Bonus facial regime knowledge: the order should be cleanse, tone, moisturize. The cleansing cleans and opens the pores, the toner closes them with a healthy barrier of free-radical-fighting goodness, and then you add healthy creams or oils that don't actually penetrate deeply into your pores but simply hang out on top and make your skin look and feel luscious. If you go out of order or skip steps, that's when you get pimples and dry skin. 

So how is this toner the best?

  1. It's cheap amen.
  2. It contains two different antioxidants with the witch hazel and green tea, and antioxidants do their best work when they're together. 
  3. It doesn't smell on its own, and it smells good if you add a couple of drops of essential oil.
  4. It's ridiculously simple and natural, so no wonky products going on your face.
  5. You're one Target trip and a mug of tea away from having this stuff at the ready.

Convinced? And for those of you who have never used toner before, just spray it on a cotton ball or round and rub it on your face. Done. If you use vitamin E or essential oils, give the bottle a shake first.

If you try it, let me know! I've been using it for almost two years, and I'll never use anything different. 

P.S. You can sub apple cider vinegar (the kind from "the mother" or whatever) for the witch hazel, but holy stink it makes your face smell like an Easter egg. But full disclosure, you can use that, too.

Happy Toning!

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