Your Home: Three Lies, Three Truths, and the One Thing That Changes It All
January cranks up the pressure when it comes to our homes, and it can mess with our heads.
We see everyone else decluttering, buying adorable storage bins at Target, and redecorating their homes for a "fresh start." Meanwhile, we know that our journeys into reorganization usually end in crying and yelling awkward insults at our lamps.
But for a moment, notice that our anxiety comes from focusing on what everyone else is doing and how everyone else's homes look. Run, Lazy Genius, run! It's a traaaap!!! To avoid capture, acknowledge the lies you believe about your home and remember the truth instead.
Lie #1: Your house has to be just so.
You're chasing impossibility here, so let's call a spade a spade. Your house will never be just so. Every item of clothing will never be washed. Every floor will never be clear of dust bunnies. Every toy will never be completely picked up. And even if you do catch that falling star and put it in your pocket, it dissolves in seconds. Nothing is perfect, and if it is, it won't stay that way for long.
The problem with this lie is believing that we can't invite people into our imperfect homes. If they open that bedroom door and see all the crap we threw in there five minutes before the doorbell rang, the only option is to dig ourselves a shame hole and stay there until everyone leaves.
But the truth?
Truth #1: People prefer an imperfect home.
If your home is perfect, others will assume you expect the same from their homes. Therefore, failing under the pressure to impress in front of your friends is the greatest gift of hospitality you can give them. Celebrate each other's imperfect homes; we all have them, and we can all love them.
Lie #2: If your house is full of cute things, it'll automatically look cute.
Target has destroyed us. Their designers are wizards who know exactly how to push my Impress People buttons. But if I have those perfectly coordinated wicker baskets to organize my stuff and that abstract brass thing on my entry table, everything will be perfect! Actually, randomly filling your home with cute things just looks like a you're having a super fly yard sale. Most of us don't know how to decorate our homes and think the problem is our stuff.
Truth #2: Things don't make a house come alive; purpose and personality do.
Your home is a reflection of the people who live there. In the same way your clothes fit your personality, the things in your home do, too. But if you forget who you are and what your home's real purpose is, the way you decorate it won't reflect that.
Our family has a purpose statement:
Our purpose as a family is to bring glory to our Father through a peaceful home environment that serves as a refuge to anyone God puts in our path, including each other.
If our home is meant to be a peaceful refuge, it affects how much we put in a room, how comfortable the furniture is, and how authentically we act in its imperfections.
Choose your home's purpose, embrace your unique personality, and discover how your home can transform without all that help from Target.
Lie #3: You are at the mercy of your house.
You don't understand, Kendra. My kitchen is HORRIBLE. There's no counter space, the paint color is all wrong, and if my husband would help me cook dinner once in awhile, he would see it, too!
I know, friend. It can be so hard to be a person sometimes. A lot of us move through our homes and only see how it's keeping us from something greater. Or maybe we get trapped by trying to impress and end up caring for fancier fabrics, high-maintenance counter tops, and All the Stuff.
Truth #3: Your house is there to serve you.
You're a grownup, and you get to decide what your house can do for you. If you spend a lot of time being a stuff manager (one of my favorite phrases ever), you're serving your stuff. But if you choose to fill your home with things that serve a specific purpose, your stuff serves you.
Mentally, if you're obsessed with all the things that are wrong about your home, you're at its mercy. But if you see your home with purpose and acknowledge that it'll never be perfect, you're able to set the tone for how people interact within its walls.
The Best Decorating Decision You'll Ever Make
If these lies are loud for you, especially in this month of decluttering and organization, I'm about to change your life.
I was going to share a list of my favorite books and blog posts to point you in the right direction, but frankly, you just need two things. One, read this super short post called "The Only 2 Tips You'll Ever Need to Keep Your Home Tidy." And two, take the Cozy Minimalist course.
The Cozy Minimalist Course
Here's my guarantee: This is the greatest investment you will ever make in your home.
The Nester is my home oracle. I've never encountered anyone who has changed the way I see my home the way she has. I thought she couldn't change my life any more until she created the Cozy Minimalist course. It is positively remarkable.
The course is short but rich. It's four online sessions you can watch at your own pace covering things like decluttering, personal style, where to put your furniture, how to make a gallery wall, etc., and it's all under The Nester's welcoming umbrella statement it doesn't have to be perfect to be beautiful.
Before I took the course, I was fine with my house. Some rooms I liked and others I hated, but I assumed I'd need to spend money on new furniture and floor plans to be happy with every inch. NOT. SO.
Not only do I feel confident creating a cozy home that uses just the right amount of things, I now have the tools to make any room reflect my style at any time of my life, and I get to use what I already have. This is totally a "teach a man to fish" course, and it's unlike anything you've ever seen.
The Nester is the master at teaching you how to create a home you love with the stuff you already have, and I can't be desperate enough in my encouragement for you to see for yourself. The course is cheaper than a lamp at $39, and I SWEAR TO YOU it'll be the best thing you ever do for you and your home.
UPDATE: The COZY MINIMALIST COURSE will close down THURSDAY, JANUARY 21ST AT MIDNIGHT. The Nester will eventually reopen it, probably this spring, but DON'T MISS YOUR CHANCE. I'm telling you. This course will change your home forever in ways you never thought possible and somehow always wanted. Register before you lose your shot.