Wonder Women, First Half of Round One
In the interest of equality and summertime fun, we're going to vote for our favorite ladies in Hollywood.
I know; it's a little overwhelming.
A few notes before we start:
- No voting for our favorite [insert name here] like we did with the guys. Too many names, way too many awesome Jennifers. We're starting with the bracket.
- The choices are living actors or have at least had a modicum of success in acting. No musicians, personalities, or beloved deceased ladies.
- This bracket has been through a VERY INTENSE vetting process. I apologize if your person was left out, but it's because they didn't meet the qualifications of being generally popular + popular with the past voting sensibilities of this group. It's a field of 128 which seems like a lot, but IT'S NOT. So many omissions, ones that made me weep. They're seeded according to general popularity which I ascertained in various ways. Please trust me. I don't want to make you angry or cry. This is the best it can be amen.
- We'll vote every Friday until we have a winner. Voting is open each week until Wednesday evenings, and then I have to close it in order to get the next round ready.
- This is for your FAVORITE. Not prettiest (we're bigger than that), not most talented (everyone has skills, y'all)... just your favorite human person from the choices in front of you.
- Be nice in the comments. If I can tone down my hatred of Anne Hathaway for the masses, you can, too.
LET'S DO THIS.
Oh, and I don't have a bracket for you to fill out; I can't find one big enough! We'll do two regions today and two next week. It's a LOT, so strap in.
P.S. So you don't get confused, today we're doing regions one and four since they're paired together in the overall bracket. I told you; this whole thing is super scientific.
P.P.S. I'm saving detailed background checks for later rounds. Frankly, I don't have time to research 128 women as much as I wish I did. #children You get snippets, and we'll get detailed later.
#1 Sandra Bullock vs. #32 Jessica Alba
Sandy, America's sweetheart amen. (Sorry, Julia.)
While You Were Sleeping, The Blind Side, Hope Floats, Gravity, The Proposal, Miss Congeniality
Jessica, mediocre actor turned lifestyle brand mogul. Respect.
Fantastic Four, Honey
#16 Glenn Close vs. #17 Jenna Fischer
Glenn, consummate professional with an epic career.
Damages, Guardians of the Galaxy, The Stepford Wives, 101 Dalmatians, Fatal Attraction, The Natural, Air Force One
Jenna, Pam Pam Pam Pam plus she makes face sandwiches for her kids on Instagram.
The Office, The Giant Mechanical Man, Blades of Glory
#8 Julia Louis Dreyfus vs. #25 Lauren Cohan
Julia, the most accomplished comedic actress in history.
Seinfeld, The New Adventures of Old Christine, Veep
Lauren, a beloved and still alive (for now) character on The Walking Dead.
The Walking Dead, Batman v. Superman: Dawn of Justice
#9 Meg Ryan vs. #24 Alicia Vikander
Meg, our 90s best friend. And that hair.
Sleepless in Seattle, You've Got Mail, When Harry Met Sally, Courage Under Fire, City of Angels, In the Land of Women
Alicia, a shockingly beautiful human who has a short but incredible career pluuuus Michael Fassbender is her boyfriend. I mean.
Ex Machina, The Man From U.N.C.L.E., The Danish Girl, Jason Bourne, The Light Between Oceans
#4 Emma Watson vs. #29 Margot Robbie
Emma, an activist and our modern day Audrey Hepburn plus Hermione.
Harry Potter, Beauty and the Beast, The Circle, The Perks of Being a Wallflower, and a magical turn in This Is the End
Margot, an up and coming beauty who told Leonardo DiCaprio to get out of her light. Yes.
The Wolf of Wall Street, About Time, Suicide Squad, Whiskey Tango Foxtrot, Focus
#13 Jessica Chastain vs. #20 Robin Wright
Jessica, a perfect performer, no bad choices, and the most perfect face.
The Martian, Interstellar, Zero Dark Thirty, The Help, The Tree of Life, The Disappearance of Eleanor Rigby, The Huntsman: Winter's War
Robin, a princess turned badass.
The Princess Bride, Wonder Woman, House of Cards, The Girl With a Dragon Tattoo, Moneybag, White Oleander, Unbreakable
#5 Connie Britton vs. #28 Krysten Ritter
Connie, Tami Taylor, Rayna James, and HAIR GOALS.
Friday Night Lights, Nashville, This Is Where I Leave You, 24, Spin City, American Horror Story
Krysten, a background player that steals the scene and then came Jessica Jones. Praise.
Jessica Jones, Breaking Bad, Don't Trust the B in Apt. 23, Big Eyes, Gilmore Girls, Veronica Mars
#12 Taraji P. Henson vs. #21 Allison Janney
Taraji, quite simply a rockstar.
Empire, Hidden Figures, Person of Interest, The Curious Case of Benjamin Button
Allison, an award shoe-in who keeps killing it.
The West Wing, Juno, Mom, American Beauty, The Girl on the Train, Masters of Sex, The Way Way Back, The Help, Away We Go, Hairspray
#3 Emily Blunt vs. #30 Anna Kendrick
Emily, perfection inside a person and married to a Final Four pick in John Krasinski.
The Devil Wears Prada, Edge of Tomorrow, Into the Woods, Sicario, The Huntsman: Winter's War, The Adjustment Bureau, The Young Victoria
Anna, a musical theater tiny person rockstar who needs to start making better career choices.
Pitch Perfect, Up in the Air, Into the Woods, Cake, Drinking Buddies, Twilight
#14 Sally Field vs. #18 Jodie Foster
Sally, she's basically our mom.
Mrs. Doubtfire, Forrest Gump, Lincoln, The Amazing Spiderman, Brothers and Sisters, ER, Steel Magnolias, Norma Rae
Jodie, and she's basically our big sister.
The Silence of the Lambs, Contact, Nell, Panic Room, Elysium, Flightplan, Sommersby, Taxi Driver, Freaky Friday
#6 Rachel McAdams vs. #27 Gal Gadot
Rachel, perfection. I mean, total and utter perfection.
The Notebook, Spotlight, Doctor Strange, True Detective, Mean Girls, Southpaw, The Vow, Sherlock Holmes, Midnight in Paris, The Time Traveler's Wife, The Family Stone, Wedding Crashers
Gal, an intense bummer that Wonder Woman is up against Rachel because she's transforming film as we speak.
Wonder Woman, Batman v. Superman, Fast & Furious, Date Night
#11 Viola Davis vs. #22 Blake Lively
Viola, a classy talent beyond reproach and a chameleon
How to Get Away With Murder, The Help, Fences, Suicide Squad, Ender's Game, Prisoners, Eat Pray Love
Blake, annoyingly beautiful and married to someone else who's annoyingly beautiful.
The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants, Green Lantern, Gossip Girl, Age of Adaline, The Town, The Shallows
#7 Natalie Portman vs. #26 Marion Cotillard
Natalie, a spunky water sprite who's been acting since she was a fetus
Black Swan, the early Star Wars movies, V for Vendetta, Jackie, Jane Get Your Gun, Thor, Brothers, The Other Boleyn Girl, Garden State, Cold Mountain, Where the Heart Is
Marion, a French acting goddess with a perfect face
La Vie En Rose, The Dark Knight Rises, Inception, Rust and Bone, Assassin's Creed, Macbeth, Midnight in Paris
#10 Helen Mirren vs. #23 Alison Brie
Helen, seriously? There are no words.
The Queen, The Hundred-Foot Journey, Calendar Girls, RED, Trumbo, The Last Station, Gosford Park
Alison, she's not just funny, y'all.
Community, Mad Men, Get Hard, The Lego Movie
#15 Angelina Jolie vs. #18 Ginnifer Goodwin
Angelina, a super interesting personal life and an unpredictable career propelled her to stardom.
Mr. and Mrs. Smith, Girl Interrupted, Salt, Wanted, Maleficent, A Might Heart, The Good Shepherd, Lara Croft, The Bone Collector
Ginnifer, a pretend princess who actually married her prince
Once Upon a Time, He's Just Not That Into You, Big Love, A Single Man, Walk the Line, Mona Lisa Smile, Ed
#2 Tina Fey vs. #31 Jennifer Love Hewitt
Tina, we all want to be here so there's that.
Saturday Night Live, 30 Rock, The Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt, Date Night, Baby Mama, Mean Girls, Whiskey Tango Foxtrot, This Is Where I Leave You, Muppets Most Wanted
Jennifer, a teen idol and still around
Ghost Whisperer, I Know What You Did Last Summer, Can't Hardly Wait, Party of Five, Criminal Minds, The Client List, Sister Act 2, Kids Incorporated
Voting is closed!
#1 Meryl Streep vs. #32 Kathryn Hahn
Meryl, zero words needed. But probably more space to list all of her movies.
The Devil Wears Prada, Julie and Julia, Doubt, Out of Africa, Kramer v. Kramer, It's Complicated, Mamma Mia, Into the Woods, August: Osage County, The Hours, Adaptation, Marvin's Room, The Bridges of Madison County, The River Wild, The Iron Lady, Sophie's Choice, The Deerhunter
Kathryn, the sidekick impossible to not love.
How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days, Crossing Jordan, The Secret Life of Walter Mitty, Bad Moms, Transparent, Parks and Rec, This Is Where I Leave You, Revolutionary Road
#16 Helen Hunt vs. #17 Judi Dench
Helen, a comedic actress turned dramatic and still kicking, y'all.
Twister, As Good As It Gets, Cast Away, Mad About You, What Women Want, The Sessions, Pay It Forward, St. Elsewhere
Judi, she's a dame and she's James Bond's boss. WINNING.
Casino Royale etc., Philomena, Pride and Prejudice, The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel, J. Edgar, Jane Eyre, Chocolat, Shakespeare In Love, 84 Charing Cross Road, A Room with a View
#8 Melissa McCarthy vs. #25 Susan Sarandon
Melissa, possibly the funniest human on the planet right now.
Bridesmaids, Gilmore Girls, Mike and Molly, The Heat, Spy, Ghostbusters, St. Vincent, This Is 40
Susan, a pot-smoking party animal who is still one of the best actresses ever.
Stepmom, The Client, Thelma and Louise, Dead Man Walking, The Rocky Horror Picture Show, Feud, The Lovely Bones, Elizabethtown, Anywhere But Here, Bull Durham, Little Women
#9 Katie Holmes vs. #24 Yvonne Strahovski
Katie, could she have a more bizarre personal life?
Dawson's Creek, Batman Begins, The Kennedys, Ray Donovan, The Giver, Thank You For Smoking, First Daughter, Pieces of April
Yvonne, if you play Chuck's girlfriend, you're automatically a favorite.
Chuck, The Handmaid's Tale, 24: Live Another Day, The Astronaut Wives Club, Dexter
#4 Lauren Graham vs. #29 Holly Hunter
Lauren, the most normal famous person out there. Please be our friend, Lauren!
Gilmore Girls, Parenthood, Evan Almighty, Bad Santa, Sweet November, NewsRadio
Holly, if you ever meet me in real life, I can do an awesome Holly Hunter impression.
The Firm, Batman v. Superman, The Piano, The Big Sick, Top of the Lake, Saving Grace, The Incredibles, O Brother Where Art Thou?, Crash, Always
#13 Julie Bowen vs. #20 Ellie Kemper
Julie, she made all of us stay-at-home moms normal again.
Modern Family, LOST, Ed, Happy Gilmore, Boston Legal, Weeds, ER
Ellie, ohmygosh she's so cute please let her live with me.
The Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt, The Office, Bridesmaids, 21 Jump Street, The Mindy Project
#5 Zooey Deschanel vs. #28 Jessica Lange
Zooey, the original hipster.
New Girl, 500 Days of Summer, Elf, Almost Famous, Yes Man, The Happening
Jessica, a powerhouse for decades.
American Horror Story, Tootsie, Cape Fear, Big Fish, The Vow, Feud, Rob Roy
#12 Keira Knightley vs. #21 Tilda Swinton
Keira, she came out of her mother wearing a corset.
Pride and Prejudice, Anna Karenina, Pirates of the Caribbean, Love Actually, The Imitation Game, Everest, Begin Again, Atonement, Seeking a Friend for the End of the World, Jack Ryan
Tilda, the weirdest chick in history and possibly one of the most talented.
The Chronicles of Narnia, Doctor Strange, We Need to Talk About Kevin, War Machine, Trainwreck, The Grand Budapest Hotel, Snowpiercer, Moonrise Kingdom, Burn After Reading, Michael Clayton
#3 Jennifer Garner vs. #30 Felicity Jones
Jennifer, our beloved one with dimples and a killer right hook.
Alias, Juno, Dallas Buyers Club, 13 Going on 30, Miracles from Heaven, Catch and Release, Daredevil
Felicity, a newer face but one that will be around a long time.
The Theory of Everything, Rogue One, Inferno, The Amazing Spiderman, The Tempest
#14 Monica Potter vs. #19 Lupita Nyong'o
Monica, another TV mom that made us all feel normal in our insanity.
Parenthood, Patch Adams, Boston Legal, Trust Me, Con Air
Lupita, is there a more stunning human and soul out there? Gracious.
12 Years a Slave (her first real role, y'all), Queen of Katwe, The Force Awakens, The Jungle Book
#6 Mindy Kaling vs. #27 Diane Lane
Mindy, a boss lady powerhouse who's hilarious and doesn't back down.
The Mindy Project, The Office, Inside Out, and soon to be in the new all female Oceans 8
Diane, she's who we want to be when we grow up.
Trumbo, Batman v. Superman, Man of Steel, Inside Out, Unfaithful, Secretariat, Nights in Rodanthe, Under the Tuscan Sun, The Perfect Storm, Murder at 1600, Lonesome Dove
#11 Charlize Theron vs. #22 Diane Keaton
Charlize, it's impossible that she's a real human.
Monster, Mad Max: Fury Road, Prometheus, Snow White and the Huntsman, Hancock, That Thing You Do, The Road, Arrested Development, The Italian Job, Sweet November, The Legend of Bagger Vance, The Cider House Rules
Diane, the definition of quirky and still very beloved.
Father of the Bride, Annie Hall, The Godfather, The Young Pope, The Family Stone, Something's Gotta Give, Marvin's Room, The First Wives Club
#7 Julie Andrews vs. #26 Sarah Paulson
Julie, she's the only person who could play a queen and we actually forget that she's not one.
Mary Poppins, The Sound of Music, The Princess Diaries, Julie's Greenroom, Despicable Me
Sarah, she can't miss. A massive talent.
The People v. OJ, American Horror Story, Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip, 12 Years a Slave, Carol, Mud, Deadwood
#10 Kerry Washington vs. #23 Kate McKinnon
Kerry, no one has done more for the popcorn industry.
Scandal, Django Unchained, Ray, Mr. and Mrs. Smith, The Last King of Scotland, Boston Legal
Kate, laugh out loud funny.
Saturday Night Live, Ghostbusters, Rough Night, Office Christmas Party, Ted 2
#15 Michelle Williams vs. #18 Scarlett Johansson
Michelle, an indie film water sprite with a tragic personal life and the best public best friend ever.
Dawson's Creek, Manchester by the Sea, Brokeback Mountain, My Week with Marilyn, Shutter Island, Blue Valentine, Oz the Great and Powerful
Scarlett, real talk I'm not a fan, but you can't deny she's a huge star.
The Avengers etc., Lost in Translation, He's Just Not That Into You, Her, Chef, Lucy, Vicky Christina Barcelona, We Bought a Zoo, The Black Dahlia, The Other Boleyn Girl, The Nanny Diaries
#2 Emma Stone vs. #31 Kirsten Dunst
Emma, no one is cooler without trying to be.
La La Land, Easy A, Crazy Stupid Love, The Help, Birdman, The Amazing Spiderman, Zombieland, Superbad
Kirsten, a child actor that dropped off and has since made a huge resurgence.
Little Women, Bring It On, Fargo, Spiderman, Hidden Figures, All Good Things, Elizabethtown, Wimbledon, Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind, Mona Lisa Smile, The Virgin Suicides